Surviving with out him...

Well, life has been a little less than lifeless... I miss my man. I hate to say my life is lifeless because he's not around, because I'm a very strong independent woman, my damn I miss him. No matter how strong I am or ever will be it's hard not to miss the love of your life. I miss his hugs, his kisses, his smell. I miss driving and having him grab my hand. I miss the inspiration he gives me at the gym. I miss reading outloud and catching him sleeping when he wants so bad to listen. I miss his spaghetti. I miss him driving... period. I miss his big strong arms that can pick me up off the couch when i've passed out and take me to bed. I miss him playing with my hair. I miss his big lower lip. I miss the way he wiggles and squirms when I touch his toes. I miss givin him a nice deep massage after a long day at work. I miss him winking at me. I miss the random mornings when he'd wake up and cook a nice breakfast. I miss making him stay in the bathroom while I take a bath so he can talk to me. I miss curling up on the couch with him to watch a Clint movie. I miss him picking me up from work. Even though he's done it hundreds of times I still grin ear to ear when I see him in the truck. I miss getting a second opinion, even if I don't agree. I miss listening to him laugh at O&A, then later trying to explain it to me. I miss snuggling up on his chest, I seem to fit perfectly. I miss his big hands. I've told him, I love that you can engulf my hand with yours. Just means you'll be able to protect me. Mostly I miss his presence. Knowing you get to come home to something, rather than nothing is just the best feeling in the world.

I just have to keep reminding myself it's all worth it. The wait, the loneliness, the pain... He's all worth it.